So. We are 24 hours into this whole thing.
I don’t know… not bad for day 1? My Aubrey Plaza post really helped me out (thanks /r/AubreyPlaza). I still feel like I’m writing to no one though. Getting views is not equal to getting readers. Still a long way to go. I’m in it for the long haul though. Let’s do this thang.
I fell in love with these guys a couple summers ago. It was classic summer love. It was intense and over way too quickly. Piers morgan broke my heart by manipulating the finals so they lost. They were the best group to ever step on the AGT stage.
(side note/rant: I despise when singers win this show. There are tons of singing shows… unless you sing with your feet or without moving your mouth, don’t go on America’s Got Talent.)
Every day around greeted with a picture that gave me an octopus boner. Coming in hot today is Amy Adams, a personal favorite of mine. Enjoy.
I’m really not sure what’s more amazing: that there have been a substantial amount of ‘anal octopus’ searches since 2011 (well, as i said earlier, that was due to time travel) OR that July-early August 2013 is the first since 2011 where there has been NO ‘anal octopus’ searches. calm before the fucking storm.
watch the video then scroll down
WAIT. Did you actually watch it or are you prematurely scrolling down?
So i’m not going to say i got a full on boner watching this. But i’m also not going to deny that a little blood didn’t flow down there. I got a little chubs that’s all. And at the end… well, there’s no buzz kill like an oh-it’s-a-guy buzz kill.
I know a lot people will say they saw it coming. If you did, well, you’re a better man than i am. I probably should have, but i’m still an amateur blogger so i’ll let it slide.
Let’s be serious here.. as an octopus, if i learned how to do this i would go viral. If this guy can do cool shit with two legs, give me 4 hackysacks and i’m going to go tour the world with my own show.
Noww for our next act… the hackysack juggling octopus (drum roll)… ANALOCTOPUSSSSSSSS (the crowd goes willldddddd)
But seriously, if i never blog again, look out for me on tour, because that’s probably what happened.
EDIT: saw this on barstool, gotta give them a s/o
now i’m a reddit guy and a taylor swift fanatic. so not for a minute will i believe that taylor swift regularly visits the cess pool of the internet. now, i’m not saying reddit is perfect. but in terms of cesspool-ness i’m pretty sure it goes: barstool, foxnews, reddit, analoctopus, about 1000 miles of shit, and then 100 more miles of shit, and then 4chan, and then 2837 more miles of shit, and then /b/. On the other spectrum of the world, taylor swift is at the top of humanity. So no, i don’t believe the conspiracy, but i’m not going to knock this guys effort… it had me question it for atleast a second.